Grades and Girls: What Your Parents Never Told You About College Page 6

  Also, people who don’t join fraternities often don’t have large social circles. They hang out with the same, small group all four years. There is nothing wrong with that at all, but in many cases it seems like people are friends with each other just to have someone to do activities with.

  In a fraternity you have tons of different guys in your organization, and you don’t have to be friends with all of them. I sure wasn’t. I was friends with guys that I got along with and had similar behaviors and mindsets.

  In fact, I had no reason to rely on these guys for social activities, because the fraternity as a whole would facilitate events. I would spend time with them because I generally enjoyed their company and we were able to help each other out with our strengths and weaknesses. A few hundred bucks a semester can’t do that.

  Another great aspect of fraternities is the leadership and networking opportunities it provides. In high school I didn’t do jack shit. I played tennis, and wrestled for half a season, but that was about it. I spent most of my time in front of a screen after school.

  When I joined my fraternity the last thing I thought I would be doing was work. I ended up taking on a number of positions throughout my time in college. It’s a great way to get experience working with others, different organizations, managing money, time and people etc. Not to mention it can look good on a resume.

  Not All Frats (And Frat Boys) Are Created Equal

  Although the media has caricatured all fraternities as being the same, this is very far from the truth. Sure, a lot of fraternities embrace the same trends and there is a ‘Greek culture’ of sorts, but there are a lot of differences between fraternities.

  For one, at large schools fraternities can usually be divided into 3-‘tiers’: Top-tier, middle-tier, and bottom-tier. Again, check out GreekRank.com for an idea of how this works.

  The concept is pretty self-explanatory: Top-tier schools are the cool, good looking party animals, mid-tier less so, and bottom-tier is well…bottom-tier.

  Think of fraternities like bars or clubs.

  Top-tier is an exclusive, ritzy nightclub. There are lots of great parties. Everyone there is really attractive and was screened before entering. However, everyone is wealthy, pretty and they can be snobby.

  Mid-tier is your run of the mill bar. Everyone gets along, has fun, but it can be at times hit or miss.

  Bottom-tier is the hole-in-the-wall dive bar.

  This is an over-generalization, but something to keep in mind.

  If pussy is your main priority, then you should shoot for the top-tier. They have the best parties, the coolest guys, and hot women flock there.

  In fact, top-tier should always be your top priority. It’s never bad to have multiple bids from awesome fraternities!

  My fraternity was mid-tier—eventually. I took a big risk, not knowing it at the time, by joining a fraternity that was rebuilding its chapter. My freshman year we didn’t even have a house!

  When we did move into the house, we had some really sweet parties. The older guys had a good social network, and when we had big parties like at Halloween we’d spread the word on Facebook. The parties were sweet!

  I would recommend doing your research to join the coolest frat you can. Sure, some guys may be snobby and pretentious, but that’s just human nature. There are plenty of asshole, d-bag, annoying guys in mid-tier frats too.

  In terms of tier breakdown, I’d say it looks something like this:

  Top-Tier: 25%

  Mid-Tier: 50%

  Bottom Tier: 25%

  Joining a mid-tier frat is not a bad thing, so by this calculation 75% of the frats you join will not be a bad choice. Especially if you really bond with some of the guys.

  This leaves the bottom 25% of fraternities that you want to avoid. Most guys in these frats are well—losers. They throw parties and do social events, they just aren’t noteworthy.

  You can pretty easily tell who these guys are. If most of them don’t dress nicely and are average, or below average in looks, you’ve got a dud.

  Non-Social and ‘Niche’ Fraternities

  Most people are only familiar with traditional, ‘social’ fraternities as they are called. However, there are actually a number of fraternities that are based around a certain niche. These include agricultural and Jewish fraternities.

  If I hadn’t already committed to rushing my fraternity I may have concerned joining Alpha Epsilon Pi—a Jewish fraternity. I met a bunch of these guys on a trip to Israel my freshman year and they were a lot of fun. Their parties were surprisingly excellent too, from a Freshman perspective at least.

  The reason I’m glad I didn’t join is because they were too homogeneous. Not only was everyone Jewish, but all their personalities seemed to align. I like a little diversity.

  There are also professional fraternities and sororities as well. They’re based around concepts like business or medicine. These organizations have their merits, but they are not what you want if socializing is your top goal.

  Finding the Fraternity That Fits You

  I keep pushing cool frats because well, they’re cool. They offer access to fun events, pretty women and lots of booze. What’s not to love?

  What is even more important, at least in my opinion, than sex and partying is connecting with your future brothers. I made some amazing friends in my fraternity and can’t imagine having it any other way.

  I know though that nearly any fraternity I would have joined would have had a group of guys I would have vibed with. Especially when a fraternity that has 100+ or even 50+ members.

  For other guys you’re going to have to find a frat that fits you well. And the problem is that you only have a few weeks to decide if you want to rush in the Fall.

  It’s a tough decision. You only go to a few rush events and you’re supposed decide who you are going to spend the next 3-4 years with! Surprisingly, this decision seems to work out well for nearly everyone. Again, with these large groups of guys you’re bound to find a group you get along with.

  Once in a blue moon someone will switch fraternities, which is looked down upon, but it does happen.

  And if you ever feel like the Greek experience is letting you down, you can just quit. I’m sure that won’t happen though.

  To make the best decision you want to do some research. For starters, use Greek Rank like previously mentioned. Check out Twitter, Facebook and Instagram pages of various different fraternities.

  Next, ask around your dorm. Although Freshman won’t know much more than you about Greek life, the word gets through the grapevine.

  You should have a couple dozen guys on your floor. There’s a good chance some of them will know about the fraternities, or even have an older brother or cousin in one of them.

  It’s also a good idea to tag along with a couple other guys to an event. Don’t roll 6 cocks deep, but a group of 2-3 guys is good because a.) It gives the image that you are already social and can make friends easily b.) Frat guys like to recruit in pairs and groups, as it gives higher numbers overall.

  Also, since you want to be the facilitator of socializing, you want to be seeking out parties. Ask around in your dorm, in class and of course ask fraternity guys at their rush events if they’re having a party that weekend. If you bring some girls it will really help your chances.

  The cool guys and hot girls are going to be seeking out parties that first weekend. Where are they going? Likely to one of the cool frats, and you should tag along as well.

  Moreover, attending a party will give you a glimpse of what you’d be signing up for. You can’t fake a good frat party. People know which frats are cool and which ones aren’t, so if you see a lot of hot girls at a house, then you know it’s the right spot.

  Not All Frat Boys Get Laid (A Lot)

  It’s important to taper your expectations. Joining a cool frat does not automatically guarantee you will get pussy. This is a huge misconception.

  Being in a cool frat gives you access to pretty girls
. You’re guaranteed nothing.

  If you’re creepy, physically unattractive, or have a terrible personality then your dick is going to stay dry. However, if you were accepted into one of these top frats, it’s unlikely those traits describe you. Nonetheless, you still need to put in some effort.

  Chris from GLL likes to say just be ‘above-average’. This means being above-average in looks, coolness and style. Doing so will all but guarantee you get laid regularly.

  As for the undersexed guys, there are plenty in every house. They simply lack one or several of the aforementioned traits.

  Life is by no means bad though. They still get to come to all the cool parties. They get to gawk at, and even hit on pretty girls at parties and mixers. Yet, the odds of them bagging one are lower than they should be.

  Why Fraternities Get So Much Hate

  Greek communities on college campuses, namely fraternities with majority white men, have big targets on their backs. Everyone from the mainstream media, feminists, campus administrators and the bottom 80% of college males have a visceral hatred of fraternities.

  There are a ton of reasons for this: Envy, greed, control, self-hatred and more.

  At the macro level society in general is moving to the left. This has accelerated in recent years.

  The idea of white males being the bane of a peaceful, successful society is proliferating. Any institution or tradition that fosters masculine, independent males is therefore a threat. This is why fraternities have a big target on their back.

  This hatred won’t just come in the form of slurs. It will manifest itself in a number of dangerous ways:

  Rape and Sexual Assault Accusations

  The most profound example was the infamous ‘A Rape On Campus’ article published by Rolling Stone. The mainstream media was foaming at the mouth at the story: A bunch of rich, evil white men heinously and violently raped an innocent drunk girl. It fit the narrative perfectly and this story garnered a ton of attention.

  The fraternity in question, Phi Kappa Psi at the University of Virginia, was suspended and dealt with a lot of hate. This wasn’t just in the form of campus protests, but legal action.

  And guess what?

  It was a hoax! A BIG FAT LIE!

  There was no apology though. Feminists and college administrators didn’t say sorry or begin to look objectively at their narrative.

  This is the type of shit you have to deal with.

  Forced Diversity

  There’s also the massive push for diversity. Because fraternities are institutions often dominated by white males, college administrators will make an effort to ‘culturally enrich’ these fraternities. This is not harmful by any means, but I simply do not approve of college admins shoving their agenda down our throats.

  Diversity should come naturally. My fraternity had guys who either lived in or immigrated from Mexico, South Korea, Cameroon, Malaysia and Germany to name a few. Pretty diverse huh? But no one told us to do that. These guys just got a long with us and we had them join. We didn’t have, nor did we want, college administrators telling us what to do.

  The Party Police

  Fraternity parties are tamer than you think. At Ohio State there were a ton of regulations that were placed upon fraternities. These included:

  No open containers: SOLO cups were not permitted. Nor were kegs. This is because it is assumed that frat guys would slip drugs into these open containers, drag women into their rooms like cavemen and rape them. Ironically, the house next door to us could have keg parties 10 feet away, but not at our house!

  No ‘binge drinking’: Liquor is banned on the main floor of fraternity houses where parties take place. And as insane as it sounds, so were 30 packs of beer! Technically, only 6-packs of beer were permitted. We had to hide our beer when the IFC inspectors (yes inspectors) came around to check to see if we were following all rules.

  4 Hour Limit: Parties were not permitted to officially run longer than 4 hours. Otherwise this would encourage ‘binge drinking’ and unsafe behavior.

  Despite all this bullshit, being in a fraternity is still much, much more fun than being an independent—in my humble opinion.

  Dealing with Stereotypes

  There are a ton of stereotypes about people in Greek life. Many are true, but most are bullshit. This article explains a ton, but I have some thoughts of my own:

  You Pay for Your Friends

  This is one of the biggest claims you’ll hear about people in fraternities. This line of thinking is totally off.

  First of all, you can’t put a price on friendship. That sounds like a generic platitude, but it’s really true.

  The idea that everyone in sororities and fraternities loves one another is bullshit. There is a ton of drama always going on. Cliques inevitably form. Fist fights even break out on rare occasions, especially when alcohol is involved.

  I had my own beef with some people. But yet I’m somehow ‘paying’ for these people to be my friends. Ridiculous.

  Also, people fail to understand that Greek organizations attract people who are already social. People who join fraternities usually have massive social networks prior to joining. They also make a ton of friends and contacts during their time.

  One of my fraternity brothers knew, or was known, by an insane amount of people on campus. When I would mention what fraternity I was in people would inevitably ask, “Oh! Do you know Josh?”

  He was nominated for homecoming court at a school with 50,000+ people. Not bad.

  Frat Guys Party All the Time

  First of all, because of the aforementioned party police, frats don’t party 24/7. I’d guess that more drinking and partying goes on than in the average college house, but it is not a 24/7 booze fest.

  Most guys who join fraternities are looking for more out of college than just getting laid. They have tough majors and get good grades. Which leads to our next stereotype:

  My Grades Will Suffer If I Join a Frat

  Using statistics from my undergrad, the average GPA of someone in Greek life was noticeably higher than the average student. Bad grades are not looked upon kindly.

  Before rushing a frat, you must show your grades. If you fucked up your first semester you are not legally permitted to rush.

  Those GPA standards stay in place during your time in Greek life. If you ever drop below a certain threshold you may be suspended.

  And finally, having a high overall GPA is a thing of pride. At my school lists were published showing the GPA’s of all fraternities. It looked really poor to be listed towards the bottom. If you got a bad GPA one semester your fellow brothers would give you shit.

  Frat Guys Rape Girls and Roofie Their Drinks

  This is a particularly disturbing stereotype. It also has no logic.

  For example, the fraternities at my school that had a reputation for using ‘roofies’ were the coolest fraternities. They had the best parties and best looking guys. They had no shortage of women throwing themselves at them.

  So what good would using roofies do?

  These guys could get laid with ease, so why risk committing a felony and ruining the rest of their life just to get laid?

  I’ve had a few girls tell me about these roofie stories. When asking them if they actually tested positive for roofies—they never had. It’s more likely they just got way too drunk.

  I went to one of the biggest schools in the country. There was never a single situation I was made aware of that involved roofies, let alone a rape or severe sexual assault.

  Who Can and Can’t Join

  One of the guys who helped start up our fraternity was a late-20’s Navy veteran. His age made him quite the anomaly. He didn’t care though. He had the benefit of living with a bunch of 18-22 year olds in a frat house, and being around young, college girls!

  We also had a 22 year old army veteran join one year after serving 4 years in the military.

  The idea that only underclassmen can join is a misconception. This goes for transf
er students as well. Priority is given to underclassmen, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try.

  Also, some minority students may feel that they are not welcome at traditional fraternities. This is nonsense. Although most fraternities are overwhelmingly white, this is because white guys are attracted to Greek life.

  There are ‘multicultural’ fraternities out there. They specifically target African-Americans, Latinos, and Asians. Like I previously mentioned, I don’t like these organizations because they lack diversity. The university thinks that by creating these organizations they’re furthering diversity, when in fact they’re actually dividing people more along racial and ethnic lines.